Dear friends,
The day was going fine, until my family was plunged into a sudden crisis. Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, everything has changed. My future has suddenly become a haze. The things around me have started to dim away. While I can't write what happened here due to certain reasons and restrictions, all I can say is that I can only share this with three people: Aunty Ros, Merf and mei.
When I look at my world now and what it was just a few hours ago, suddenly many things look at though they are folly to me. As my world crashed. Only a few things remained constant and apparent. God is still with me. I have a tiny handful of people for which to fall back on and I have deep peace in my heart, despite the storm raging around me now.
Too many things have happened in the past few weeks and the past year and has culminated into a crisis today. My life will never be the same again. My world now looks totally different. Many things are meaningless to me now. One thing is for sure. I have a very different perspective about relationships now. Very different.
Girls, popularity, money, looks, fame, intelligence, friends, fun, pleasure, objects, desires, feelings, yearnings...They are meaningless pursuits. Only God is the real anchor of life. Nothing else can compare to Him.
Friends, whoever reads this. Everyone. Whether you know me or not, or are just regular readers. I just want to tell you that you'll never make a mistake following Jesus. Life as a Christian is not easy. In fact, it will get harder and harder. Life will be tough. Jesus doesn't offer a religion, He hates religion. He offers you a relationship. I can tell you that He is truly the Way, the Truth and the Life. Though my world has collapsed around me, I have a deep sense of peace within my heart. The peace of God is on me and it surpasses all understanding.
I don't think I'll blog anymore given the current chaotic situation. I have to turn to the Lord and just pray and to seek refuge in the Lord, who is my shield, my strength, my fortress, my deliverer, my shelter, my strong tower in time of need. Life will not be easy from now on, but I am even more determined to follow Jesus.
I know I've messed up my Christian life for as long as I've been a Christian. I've done so many wrong deeds. I've let my King down so many times, I've broken his commandment so many times. I've done things that I am ashamed of. I've done everything He doesn't want me to do and nothing of what He wants me to do. I've really screwed up my walk with Him. But Jesus is still so good to me. He's picked me up so many times I've lost count already.
Truly, God is an exceedingly abundantly good God and He loves me. Although I'm messed up badly, He still loves me so much, yet at the same time loves me too much to keep me this way. Someday, I hope to answer my calling from the Lord, although honestly, it sounds totally ridiculous to me at this current point in time. I love Jesus. And I'm determined to follow Him, love Him, obey Him, glorify Him and lay down my life for Him.
I don't wish to say. I wish to do. Actions speaks louder than all manner of words.
"For God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever" - Ps 73:26
At the end of the day, its all about Jesus, its all about Him.
turn your eyes upon Jesus
look full in His wonderful face
and the things of the earth will grow strangely dim
in the light of His glory and grace
The day was going fine, until my family was plunged into a sudden crisis. Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, everything has changed. My future has suddenly become a haze. The things around me have started to dim away. While I can't write what happened here due to certain reasons and restrictions, all I can say is that I can only share this with three people: Aunty Ros, Merf and mei.
When I look at my world now and what it was just a few hours ago, suddenly many things look at though they are folly to me. As my world crashed. Only a few things remained constant and apparent. God is still with me. I have a tiny handful of people for which to fall back on and I have deep peace in my heart, despite the storm raging around me now.
Too many things have happened in the past few weeks and the past year and has culminated into a crisis today. My life will never be the same again. My world now looks totally different. Many things are meaningless to me now. One thing is for sure. I have a very different perspective about relationships now. Very different.
Girls, popularity, money, looks, fame, intelligence, friends, fun, pleasure, objects, desires, feelings, yearnings...They are meaningless pursuits. Only God is the real anchor of life. Nothing else can compare to Him.
Friends, whoever reads this. Everyone. Whether you know me or not, or are just regular readers. I just want to tell you that you'll never make a mistake following Jesus. Life as a Christian is not easy. In fact, it will get harder and harder. Life will be tough. Jesus doesn't offer a religion, He hates religion. He offers you a relationship. I can tell you that He is truly the Way, the Truth and the Life. Though my world has collapsed around me, I have a deep sense of peace within my heart. The peace of God is on me and it surpasses all understanding.
I don't think I'll blog anymore given the current chaotic situation. I have to turn to the Lord and just pray and to seek refuge in the Lord, who is my shield, my strength, my fortress, my deliverer, my shelter, my strong tower in time of need. Life will not be easy from now on, but I am even more determined to follow Jesus.
I know I've messed up my Christian life for as long as I've been a Christian. I've done so many wrong deeds. I've let my King down so many times, I've broken his commandment so many times. I've done things that I am ashamed of. I've done everything He doesn't want me to do and nothing of what He wants me to do. I've really screwed up my walk with Him. But Jesus is still so good to me. He's picked me up so many times I've lost count already.
Truly, God is an exceedingly abundantly good God and He loves me. Although I'm messed up badly, He still loves me so much, yet at the same time loves me too much to keep me this way. Someday, I hope to answer my calling from the Lord, although honestly, it sounds totally ridiculous to me at this current point in time. I love Jesus. And I'm determined to follow Him, love Him, obey Him, glorify Him and lay down my life for Him.
I don't wish to say. I wish to do. Actions speaks louder than all manner of words.
"For God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever" - Ps 73:26
At the end of the day, its all about Jesus, its all about Him.
turn your eyes upon Jesus
look full in His wonderful face
and the things of the earth will grow strangely dim
in the light of His glory and grace
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